This week I just couldn't get myself to sit down and really think about what I was going through. I would rather stay busy all the time and not leave any room for thinking and reflecting.
However, I feel better this week. I met with Dr. Warneke at the Arizona Cancer Center (through UMC) on Thursday. The entire first visit as a patient at the center took around 2 and 1/2 hours, every minute for which I am thankful. Thus far, I will tell anyone who asks that the ACC is an amazing place, where everyone there cares about the patient, not just the diagnosis.
I met with Dr. Sahai at Southwestern Surgery on Friday and he pretty much freaked me out again, though I have gathered my thoughts concerning him. Here's the layout:
Dr. Warneke:
-First and foremost is a sarcoma specialist
-Does not believe that I have a 'very serious' thing to worry about
-Did say that my tumor was over 5cm (it was 7cm) which is not a good thing
-Needed to see what the tumor was 'graded,' out of 1-4, he was guessing it was a 2 with 1 being the least aggressive and 4 being the most aggressive (I apparently did not receive a full biopsy report from Dr. Farve, ugh)
-Said a grade 2 tumor was managable (rather easily too)
-Said he believed I had a less than 1% chance that the cancer has spread
-Said he was pretty sure I wouldn't need radiation, but if there is any sign that the cancer which is still in my leg has spread, I will have to get radiation
-Said it was really odd that my first incision was completely horizontal, but it wasn't too big of a deal
Dr. Sahai:
-Is a surgical oncologist with no specialization in my type of cancer
-Said radiation for sure
-Said surgery incisions would be rather difficult since my first incision was horizontal (thanks a lot Dr. Kelly Farve...)
-Had the full biopsy report but said that since my sarcoma was of the Myxoid-type, it wasn't 'graded' (what!?)
Okay, so nothing against Dr. Rohit Sahai, but he is not a specialist in my area, and he really freaked me out in the appointment by taking the 'better-cover-myself-and-do-all-treatments-just-in-case' route. Dr. James Warneke, on the other hand, was super informative, very attentive to my ideas and my anxieties, and heck, he specializes in sarcomas. Thus, my decision is to go to the ACC and have Dr. Warneke and the other sarcoma specialists there take my case.
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There is a flip side. The fact is, without God in the picture, nothing can be done. Without God on my side, my cancer will not heal. Without God's healing, loving hand, I will not be okay. I rely on God's mercy and strength day to day and I can not exist without him.
Exodus 15:2-3
2 The LORD is my strength and my song;
he has become my salvation.
He is my God, and I will praise him,
my father's God, and I will exalt him.
3 The LORD is a warrior;
the LORD is his name.
It is so hard to have to rely so heavily on doctors to answer our swirling questions and concerns. So I am thrilled that you found someone who will hear your anxieties and seek to meet your needs. I will continue to pray that God grants you wisdom to discern through the doctor's words.
ReplyDeleteI also LOVE the passage you've included here! I was meditating on these verses earlier this year, but I somehow missed verse 3. He is a warrior and He will fight for you, His precious daughter. He will be your salvation, and He is already your song. Keep singing Him! May you feel His strength as you fight, and may He fight for you when you feel you no longer can. Come to Him you who are burdened and heavy-laden, and He will give you rest.